Definition of meaningful (adj)
- [ méeningfəl ]
- with meaning: having a discernible meaning
- significant: conveying a meaning or significance that is not directly expressed
- adding value to life: adding significance, meaning, or purpose to somebody’s life
I started my blog meaningful mommy because I felt like I needed to do a better job of living meaningfully and creating meaningful experiences for my children. I have come to a conclusion.
Moms, we are meaningful just by being mothers. We add purpose to our children’s life because we try. Being meaningful does not depend on being successful or perfect. It’s only requirement is we try. We have good days and bad days and in-between days. Bad days are still meaningful. We are trying, learning, practicing. Practice is meaningful. The good days where it all seems to fall into place are meaningful. We feel successful and content. Those moments are meaningful too. It’s the whole package, all those minutes, days, years, all of it, all together, all the moments that make up our lives. Sometimes you just need someone else’s eyes to show you how to really see.
The eyes I needed were almost 92 years old. My friend, her three year old daughter and her almost 92 year old Mimi came over the other day. We were sitting in the sun, drinking ice-tea, chatting. I was hearing an amazing story of a boating journey around the world being told by Mimi, a story I can’t wait to hear more of. As I was listening to her and planning my own extraordinary adventures yet to come I noticed Mimi’s gaze falling on her great-granddaughter playing with my daughter. Her eyes sparkled. I could sense her joy. It radiated of her face. She complimented my friend and I as parents telling us we have obviously done it (parenting) right just by watching our girls play.
I got it. That look of joy shot through me and a smile spread across my face. I looked at the two blond three-year olds sitting in the cardboard box with their plastic ponies playing a made-up game of their design. It really was beautiful. There was so much going on in their little world that would not be made any better if I had my mommy hand in it. Right there, I realized that we as moms do not need to be right there all the time. We do not need to be always playing with or micro-managing our kids.
We teach our children and model for them and share our tools and then we need to let them go, to practice. Sometimes they play nicely, and we feel successful. But they may fight, they may fail and need to try again. When this happens I seem to feel like I need to know more, find a new way…but really they just need more practice. But again sometimes they may get it beautifully right. Like today. Those two little sweets had it together. We did that. My friend and I, along with the support we have from our family, friends and loved ones, but us too. Mom’s we can give ourselves credit. We are meaningful.
I am so grateful that my friend shared her grandma with me. I miss mine and I really feel we can learn so much from our elders. I was pleasantly reminded of that today. Mimi taught me that it’s ok to let go. It is needed and it is important. To sit and watch two children playing is meaningful. Letting our kids grow and play and just be is meaningful. My friend and I deserve to sit and chat and cultivate our friendship because that is meaningful. We can sit and listen to the wonderful memories of adventure from woman who is now planning her 95th birthday party almost three years from now. That is meaningful too. We don’t need to always be evaluating each individual action for it’s worth. It is all the different moments of our day which create a meaningful life.
Mom’s If I promise to cut myself some slack, will you do the same?
I promise to get out of my own way.
I promise to not over think this parenting thing.
I promise to stop making being a mother harder than it needs to be. 🙂
Mom’s don’t need to figure out how to be meaningful…we just need to be open to recognizing we already are!