I love this. So often our troubles could be less if we shared more and took that first step. Don’t wait, hoping for people to be mind readers…..Keep it simple & take charge 🙂
Our unvoiced expectations are the reason for much of our unhappiness. These ideals in our heads that will prove someone’s friendship, love, care, admiration, support…only they don’t do what we envision.
He doesn’t buy me the bracelet we saw together that I was sure was created just for me. If he had bought it for my Christmas gift I would know he loved me. It was meant for us, personified our relationship, only I said nothing. He should just know. I am heart-broken.
I spend my birthday afternoon alone. Disappointed my close friends didn’t plan a special lunch date for me. They should know that although I am often happiest having a quiet afternoon at home, that today is different. It’s my birthday! But..again, I say nothing. I am let down.
I miss my mom. If she was thinking about me she’d call. I could really use her advice. Why doesn’t she check on me? But I did spend my whole life trying foster my independence. I don’t call her. I wait.
Do any of these scenarios sound familiar? Or something along these lines? I know I have been let down by people without their knowledge. It has been my expectations and lack of communicating them that has done this. Not my husband, friends, or family. Me. There is no-one to blame other than myself.
I need to remember that there is no mind reading in relationships. We need to be clear and just ask for what we need, to tell people our expectations. Life would be so much nicer and simpler for everyone involved.
So it’s easy, If you want something just ask. If you miss someone, just call. If you love someone, tell them. If you like or don’t like something, voice your opinion. Make yourself heard instead of suffering in silence. This is your life, own it 🙂